Bex Curran in a checkerboard apron and a head-torch, mid-recipe in her kitchen. — Bex, mid-recipe, fully committed.

Rebecca Curran · Home Cook · Survivor

I almost poisoned my family. You'll be fine.

Hi! I'm Bex, and I am, at most, an amateur cook.

I started cooking because my parents worked late and I wanted to help. At first it was hard — I lived off the freezer and dreaded every dinner. Then something clicked, and now I'm excited to try new things, even when "new things" means green curry paste cooked in a mug.

This site — and the cookbook behind it — is the proof. I let an AI food critic read the whole thing. It had thoughts. I've published them anyway, because they're funny, and because they're not wrong.

Browse the unhinged recipes Get the full cookbook (PDF)

✎ please season to taste — I clearly didn't.

Peer Review

An AI read the cookbook. It had concerns.

I handed the full 28-page cookbook to an AI food critic and asked for an honest opinion. It did not hold back. Here's the highlight reel — reprinted with love, and zero notes taken personally.

★★☆☆☆

The Dump-and-Pray Method

"Raw vegetables treated like an afterthought — tossed into a dish with no browning, no searing, no pre-roasting." No notes. Just vegetables, meeting their fate.

— the panel, unimpressed

★★☆☆☆

Wet-on-Wet Cuisine

Water-heavy ingredients go straight into bakes and pans, creating "a steaming effect rather than caramelisation." Every texture in the bowl: soft. The human brain, it turns out, likes a little crunch.

— the panel, going soft

★★★☆☆

Six Spices Walk Into a Pan

A tendency to throw six to eight competing dried spices into a dish without letting them bloom in hot oil first — leaving everything tasting "raw and dusty" rather than deep.

— the panel, sneezing

★★☆☆☆

Zero Acid, All Confidence

Good cooking balances salt, fat, acid, and heat. Many recipes here skip the acid entirely — no lemon, no vinegar, no pickle. Just carbs, meeting more carbs, unchaperoned.

— the panel, craving a squeeze of lime

★★★☆☆

The Verdict

"If a recipe looks unappealing on the page, or texturally weird in the method — trust your gut and skip it." Bex trusted her gut and published a cookbook instead.

— the panel, respecting the chaos

★★★★☆

In Her Own Words

Bex's own bio openly jokes about "almost poisoning" her family and calls her food "unexplainable and worrying." The panel noted this was, unfortunately, an accurate preview.

— the panel, at least she's honest

Highlights only — the full, unfiltered review is somewhere on Bex's hard drive, probably. Judge the source material yourself →

The Hall of Fame

The certified unhinged recipes

Six recipes so distinctive the reviewer singled them out by name. Each one is real, each one is in the actual cookbook, and each one is reproduced here exactly as written — chaos included.

Microwave 💀💀💀🤍🤍